Fantasy football start/sit advice guide: Best and worst picks for NFL Week 12

Disclaimer: Starts and Sits are relative to where a player is ranked on the aggregate. In other words, a “Start” is someone I like more than most, and a “Sit” is the opposite. So if I say to start Jacoby Brissett and sit Drew Brees, that doesn't mean I'd start Jacoby over Brees, it just means I think Brissett will exceed his expectations while Brees will underperform his. Cool? Cool. Let's get it. -Seltz

Disclaimer to the disclaimer: Hey guys. I just wanted to quickly say Happy Thanksgiving. I'm incredibly thankful to anyone who takes the time to read even one word I write, so thank you. With that in mind, I'm going to attempt to show my gratitude this week by doing things a little differently. I'm going to do more but less. More starts and sits, but less of my verbosity. I am going to actually, legitimately be more efficient with my words and live up to my (just appointed) nickname, “Mr. Brevity.”

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QUARTERBACK

START

Carson Wentz (vs. CHI) – He's matchup proof. Top 3 fantasy QB from here on out. Also, he's literally the greatest thing that's ever happened to me. He completes me.

Russell Wilson (@SF) – Ditto to everything I said about Wentz for Wilson, minus the whole completing me thing of course. Plus, Wilson faces a horrible Niners pass defense. If that kind of thing matters to you.

Matt Ryan (vs. TB) – Tampa's yielding the second-most passing yards per game of any team in the league. Ryan's been slightly better as of late, and he's at home. That's all I got.

Ben Roethlisberger (vs. GB) – Ben is coming off his best performance of the season and is facing a trash Packers defense. Most importantly, he's playing at home. Home Ben is the best Ben. Road Ben is a total jerk though. Real Ben, also probably a jerk.

Jacoby Brissett (vs. TEN) – Brissett is...good? I'm going to say...yes. Brissett is good. You know what's not good? Tennessee's pass defense. In fact, it's bad. They've allowed 21 touchdowns through the air. 21! Again, bad. So in other words, this is your classic good vs. bad scenario. Gotta go good.

Nathan Peterman (@ KC) – Sean McDermott forced me to include Peterman as a start. He said I won't regret the decision, even if Peterman throws five interceptions in one half.

Thanksgiving Day Games:

Kirk Cousins (vs. NYG) – Only three teams have allowed more passing touchdowns than the Giants. They are also 29th in passing yards allowed per game and have yielded the third-most fantasy points to QB's. You know what that means, it's discount time! Fire up Kurt Coupons and the savings will start rolling in!!!

SIT

Drew Brees (@ LAR) – For what it's worth, I was saying to sit Brees before it was cool to say it. I'm still here.

Alex Smith (vs. BUF) – Alex Smith is still here too, I'm just not sure for how much longer. With Pat Mahomes waiting in the wings, Smith's season has taken a turn for the worse. I don't think it gets better for him this week, at least not compared to what is expected.

Mitchell Trubisky (@ PHI) – No one is starting Mitchell Turbisky. I think we can all agree on that. I'm thinking of this more as a career sit. The Eagles defense is going to be so up in Mitchell's grill on Sunday that it's going to scar him for the rest of his career. That's how bad it's going to be for old Mitchy. Or young Mitchy, I guess. Whatever, you knew what I meant.

Thanksgiving Day Games:

Dak Prescott (vs. LAC) – How long til people start calling for Cooper Rush?! I kid, I kid. In all seriousness, the Chargers are solid against the pass and they have the league's best pass rushing tandem in Joey Bosa and Melvin Ingram. Dak has been terrible the last two weeks without Zeke and Tyron Smith. I think that trend continues.

RUNNING BACK

START

Kareem Hunt (vs. BUF) – Hey Andy, WTF bro?! Seriously, What. The. Eff. Why can't you change? After all these years you still won't run the effing ball when you have an insanely talented running back. It cost Big Red a game last week, I don't think it happens again. Why, you ask? Because the Bills have one of the league's worst rushing defenses. They've allowed 10 rushing TD's over the last four weeks. 10!!! Not even Andy Reid can be that stupid, right? Nevermind, let's move on.

Mark Ingram and Alvin Kamara (@ LAR) – Obviously. Just making sure. Start them in DFS too, the Rams are terrible against the run.

Thanksgiving Day Games:

Melvin Gordon and Austin Eckler (@ DAL) – Dallas Sucks. No, seriously. They actually suck at football. They especially suck at defense when Sean Lee isn't on the field. Sean Lee won't be on the field.

Alfred Morris (vs. LAC) – Remember when people cared about Alfred Morris? Remember? People used to call him “The Butler” and “Alf.” You honestly don't remember that? Hmm. Anyhoo, point is, people used to care about him and now they don't, but they probably should this week. The Chargers have the league's worst run defense. Literally, the worst. I guess what I'm trying to say is, get ready for the return of Alf! Btw, I loved the tv show Alf when I was younger. Kinda weird that Alf ate cats though, right? Yeah, it's definitely weird.

Latavius Murray and Jerrick McKinnon (@ DET) – One of these two will be good for sure. Maybe even both of them. But definitely at least one. Which one? No idea. Hope that helps.

Orleans Darwka (@ WAS) – Darkwa has three main things going for him. One, he's not half bad – 69 (nice) or more rushing yards in six of his last seven. Two, Washington's allowed the third-most fantasy points to RB's. Three, he has an awesome name. That's good enough for me.

SIT

Jordan Howard (@ PHI) – No team has allowed less rushing yards per game than the Eagles. Zilch. Zip. Zero. Why am I only saying z-words? Point is, the Eagles are good at stopping the run. Especially when they don't have to worry too much about the pass. Yeah, you heard me Mitchy.

Joe Mixon (vs. CLE) -- I feel like this has a become a weekly occurrence, but in case you're new here, I'm not a Joe Mixon fan. I hate him. Plus, the Browns are sneaky good at defending the run. For what it's worth, they are also sneaky good at nothing else.

Thanksgiving Day Games:

None. None at all. I like all the running backs. Well, I don't hate any at least. And I'm thankful for that. See what I did there? Yeah, you're right. Not my best work. I'll try to do better. I won't, obviously, but I'll try. More importantly, the whole thing was a lie – Ameer Abdullah, who sucks, is a definitive sit for me against a stingy Vikings run defense. Sorry for lying. I'll make it up to you by attempting to be even more brief!

WIDE RECEIVER

START

Alshon Jeffrey (vs. CHI) – ALSHON REVENGE GAME!!!

Jarvis Landry (@ NE) – High floor, low ceiling. I like Landry, who has scored a touchdown three games in a row, in a game where the Dolphins will likely be forced into a pass-heavy game script.

Danny Amendola (vs. MIA) – Obviously you're starting Cooks in a great matchup, but Amendola is a nice under-the-radar play too.

Corey Davis (@ IND) – This is a home run play, but Davis (17 targets over the last two weeks) is clearly talented and has a terrific matchup against Indy.

Thanksgiving Day Games:

Adam Thielen (@ DET) – You're starting (and loving) Thielen if you own him. Duh. But I just wanted take it a step further and say Thielen is a top-five wide receiver each week, regardless of the matchup, until further notice. It is decided.

Keenan Allen (@ DAL) – “Yoooooooooooo, that's my dawg.” That's what Keenan Allen owners were saying this past Sunday. Well, one of them was anyway. Allen busted out with 12 catches for 159 yards and 2 TD's. Now he gets to face an atrocious Dallas defense. As we've already discussed, Dallas sucks.

Josh Doctson (vs. NYG) – Docston continues to get better each week and is earning more and more of Kurt Coupons' trust. More importantly, he faces one of the worst pass defenses in the league. More more importantly, his last name sounds like a type of dog. A hot dog, dog.

SIT

Michael Thomas (@ LAR) – Don't get me wrong, Thomas is really good. And you're starting him if you own him. But he only has two touchdowns this season and is facing a good Rams pass defense, sooooooooo...

Amari Cooper (vs. DEN) – “OVER-RATED” *clap clap, clap clap clap” – OVER-RATED” *clap clap, clap clap clap” – OVER-RATED” *clap clap, clap clap clap.”

Thanksgiving Day Games:

Dez Bryant (vs. LAC) – Dez is bad. Casey Heyward, who will be covering him, is the opposite of bad. Way, way the opposite. Did I mention Dez is bad?

Marvin Jones Jr. (vs. MIN) – Two words: Xavier Rhodes.

TIGHT END

START

Delanie Walker (@ IND) – Delanie has been really good, he just hasn't scored a touchdown. Well guess what, I'm calling my shot: Delanie Walker will score his first touchdown this week! Book it.

Jack Doyle (vs. TEN) – Same game alert! I won't say Doyle's going to score a touchdown. Which means he'll score one and Walker won't lol. Seriously though, Doyle is a target monster with an incredibly high floor.

Thanksgiving Day Games:

Evan Engram (@ WAS) – Washington is awful at defending tight ends. Engram is one of the better tight ends. Well, he's one of the better wide receivers masquerading as a tight end. Either way, he's good.

Vernon Davis (vs. NYG) – The Giants have allowed a tight end touchdown in every game this season, save for last week's s*** show against the Chiefs. With Jordan Reed out, Davis should thrive.

SIT

Austin Seferian-Jenkins (vs. CAR) – The Panthers are tough on tight ends and ASJ has been trending downward.

Cameron Brate (@ ATL) – Same and same.

Thanksgiving Day Games:

All tight ends not named Evan Engram or Vernon Davis.

DEFENSE

START

Philadelphia Eagles (vs. CHI) – Mitchell Trubisky.

Thanksgiving Day Games:

Los Angeles Chargers (@ DAL) – Dallas Sucks.

SIT

None. For real this time.

KICKER

START

Some guy who's playing in a dome or who's on a team with a good offense.

[BLG Note: Kamu Grugier-Hill! Just kidding.]

SIT

Any guy who doesn't qualify the above set standard for “Start.”

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