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Sunday Night Football made the stupidest Eagles-Cowboys video ever

I’m very displeased.

NFL: Arizona Cardinals at Philadelphia Eagles Bill Streicher-USA TODAY Sports

Hey, look, garbage!

Sunday Night Football released an absolutely screaming pile of poo on Thursday afternoon, in which they set out to see if they could put out the worst #content this side of the Mississippi.

Then they made this video, because they are awful:

I’d like to imagine this video was slapped together by two 65-year-olds who genuinely hate each other with just a scalding, decades-long fire. They sat in a dark production room, late one Thursday night, with one light on and the rest of the office pitch black, and stared at a blank whiteboard for 30 minutes before they just said, “Alright, screw it, let’s do the Santa bullshit.”

But you know that’s not what happened. You know there was a room of mid-30s #ContentProducers who thought this was brilliant.

One stood up and went, “You know what would be great? If we made election videos, but instead of making them in ANY way relevant to the current teams playing — you know, like Carson vs. Dak as our football Clinton vs. Trump, which while cheesy would actually make a modicum of sense — we can use the stupidest, most played-out story in the history of sports fandom to show people how out of touch and truly, truly unoriginal our brains are!”

And then another one stood up, looked at the first, and screamed, “YOU’RE A GENIUS!”

Don’t forget that we’ll also see the shot of Jim’s cheesesteaks on Sunday night’s broadcast, and probably the Liberty Bell, and also the Rocky statue, because Philadelphia — a city with over a million people in the metropolitan area, with some of the coolest buildings in the country and a vibrant music scene as bright as that of any city in the States right now — is literally built on sliced ribeye and Sylvester Stallone.

I hate everyone.

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