Football is finally underway (somewhat), with pre-season games kicking off this weekend and a little over a month to go before the start of the regular season. Each week we'll review what's been going on in the NFC East, but since no one has played a game yet, completely subjective rankings will do for now.
1. Philadelphia Eagles
Of course the Eagles are first, what did you expect? You know the story of the crazy Eagles off-season already, so no need to rehash the whole thing. Let's just focus on what's happened recently in case you missed anything. JaCorey Shepherd is done for the year after tearing his ACL. Shepherd was the favorite to be the slot corner this year, but the Eagles have plenty of options available to fill that role, which was going to see a decrease in playing time from last year anyway. In this month's installment of "Is Chip Kelly Racist?" we heard from two black players on the team who say no, he's not, he just sees players as commodities. Wonder if "Play With Fire" will be featured at practice. Also Billy Davis, who didn't start Brandon Graham until he had to, agrees with Graham that he can get a Madden-esque 32 sacks this year.
Tweet of the week(ish):
@Southern_Philly memes are always bad pic.twitter.com/Pi2jnSbYMB
— Nick Vuono (@nvuono) August 2, 2015
2. Dallas Cowboys
Darren McFadden showed up to camp injured. Shocker. Oh hey look at that, the coaches aren't happy about it. Maybe if they had taken someone from a deep pool of running backs in the draft they'd have a viable alternative to Joseph Randle. But they didn't, and Stephen Jones admits that was a mistake by them. Speaking of Randle, apparently the Cowboys voted on whether or not to keep Joseph Randle last year. Not the front office. The players. No word on if the vote was unanimous.
All three of the Cowboys' top running backs are currently dealing with injury issues. Randle is sidelined with a strained oblique, which isn't considered to be too serious but could cause him to miss some preseason action. McFadden hasn't practiced all summer. Lance Dunbar has missed nearly a week of practice after spraining his ankle.
And in further Cowboys snafus, fans and Greg Hardy arranged for a banner to fly over Eagles practice at the Linc. Just one problem.... it was during the national anthem. With many members of the military in attendance. The Dallas Cowboys hate our troops.
Tweet(s) of the week:
— Jerome's Friend (@JeromesFriend) August 9, 2015
Joseph Randle just coughed up the ball. It came on he same day Jason Garrett talked about having Randle walk around with a ball.
— Charean Williams (@NFLCharean) August 6, 2015
Jason Garrett kicks the second team offense off field after multiple mistakes. Not pleased. Brought back the ones
— Todd Archer (@toddarcher) August 6, 2015
Washington Redskins
What the Redskins lack in talent, coaching, leadership and stability, they more than make up for in hilarity. This is a team that doesn't move equipment out of the way, leading to their star receiver separating his shoulder when he hit a blocking sled. Just par for the course in Washington, where they think that more people read about their training camp than there are people on the Earth.
This is a team where the owner reads a puff piece by ESPN on Scot McCloughlan and then is so wowed by it that he hired him. Whenever you can mimic late 90s Al Davis, you do it Dan Snyder. McCloughlan somehow locked Snyder in a room during free agency, the Redskins have not been declared the winners of the off-season, which means it has been a terrible summer for them. But fear not! McCloughlan drafted Brandon Scherff 5th overall to be a right tackle! But after just a handful of practices at right tackle it has been decided that he can't cut it there and moved him to guard. Hail to the Redskins.
But the best part of the Redskins offseason was Snyder saying that Jay Gruden was stealing his money by not playing Robert Griffin III. Never, ever sell the team Daniel.
Tweet of the week:
#Redskins love the character in their defensive meeting room. They believe they can bring in a player with questions & keep it together
— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) July 31, 2015
Ian, you are talking about a group of people who consider DeAngelo Hall a leader.
New York Giants
Nothing has gone the Giants way this summer. Most notably Jason Pierre-Paul lost a finger in a fireworks accident on the 4th of July. (If you're looking for a good fantasy football name, "Nine Finger Discount." You're welcome.) The team has reportedly inquired about the services of Aldon Smith, which means they are desperate. But we knew that already after they brought back Steve Spagnolou. JPP is not the only major injury the Giants had this summer, starting left tackle Will Beatty tore his pectoral muscle, he will be out until November at the earliest, possibly the entire season. Taking his place in the starting lineup looks to be 15th overall draft pick Ereck Flowers, who the most generous scouting reports labeled as "raw." The Giants start the season against some weak pass rushers, so expect Flowers to get undeserved credit for looking good while blocking the likes of Jeremy Mincey, Kroy Biermann and Trent Murphy. They are supposedly considering adding the zombie formerly known as Jake Long to the mix.
All of this means they are set up to go 7-9 and win the Super Bowl that you should consider this season Tom Coughlin's farewell tour. If for some reason he survives, well, multiple farewell tours worked for Mötley Crüe. And that's the only time anyone has ever and will ever put Tom Coughlin and Mötley Crüe in the same sentence with a straight face.
Tweet of the week:
What the hell is going on! 3 @Giants OL sitting out today (4 if u count Beatty) after a day off on Tues. So much for that Toughness!
— Shaun O'Hara (@ShaunOHara60) August 6, 2015
Former Giants calling out former teammates. A tradition unlike any other.
This week:
Thursday: Colt McCoy and the Redskins visit the Browns. The Cowboys are in San Diego, there will probably be a lot of sailors there, please remind them that the Cowboys hate them.
Friday: The Giants downward spiral continues with a trip to Cincinnati, while they are there they will play a football game.
Sunday: Trent Cole and Todd Herremans will be at Lincoln Financial Field in Colts uniforms.