Winning the NFC East will be slightly better than getting a participation trophy. Unless you're the Eagles, then getting a participation trophy is pretty good.
Dallas Cowboys (2-2)
Last Week: Lost in painful, humiliating fashion to the Saints, who are terrible, in overtime 26-20. Joseph Randle and Darren McFadden combined for 57 yards on 21 carries behind the Greatest Offensive Line In History, which is about what you would expect to get if your running backs received the handoff then ran backwards. Lance Dunbar, the only Cowboys running back worth anything this year, tore his ACL. Sean Lee has a concussion. Like last week, the Cowboys started hot, gaining 154 yards and scoring 10 points on their first two drives, then completely sputtered the rest of the game, gaining 181 yards and scoring 10 points in the rest of the game. This team is going to win the division and Jason Garrett will be named Coach of the Year.
This Week: Host the Patriots. Have fun with that.
Tweets of the Week:
Cowboys getting a big boost this week with Guy Who Beats Women and Guy Who Tested Positive For PCP returning to the lineup.
— Dan Schmidt (@DanS_SotS) October 5, 2015
Blank character creator template from the newest Madden think he slick pic.twitter.com/Lo6V7yHbqy
— Neon Czolgosz (@Hegelbon) October 5, 2015
New York Giants (2-2)
Last Week: Somehow managed to defeat the Bills, 24-10, despite no one actually doing anything. Eli Manning threw for just over 200 yards. Rashad Jennings was both the team's leading rusher and receiver and he had less than 100 yards from scrimmage. The Giants had a turnover margin of just +1; they only sacked Tyrod Taylor twice on 42 attempts, he was sacked on 10% of his drop backs entering the game. Up 24-10 with 3:51 to play from the Bills 8 yard line, the brilliant Bob McAdoo called a pass instead of a run, so of course Eli Manning threw an interception, preventing the Giants from taking an extremely safe 17 point lead. Basically they won by not being as bad as the Bills. They're going to win the division and then the Super Bowl.
This Week: Host the 49ers, who have the worst point differential in the league, so you know it will be a close game.
Tweets of the Week:
.@JoeandEvan asks Prince Amukamara what he thinks of Aaron Rodgers, calling him best QB in world: "After Eli, I would say he's up there."
— Art Stapleton (@art_stapleton) September 29, 2015
I forgot all about Eyes Wide Shut/Indecent Proposal/Dunkin Donuts Eli Manning pic.twitter.com/mFmkPAkSFe
— Dracula's Friend (@Bro_Pair) September 29, 2015
Washington Redskins (2-2)
Last Week: Beat the hapless Eagles 23-20. Curt Cousins rallied the Redskins to a 4th quarter lead for only the second time in his glorious career, throwing his only TD of the game, it probably shouldn't have been caught. Some guy named Chris Thompson ran roughshod over the Eagles early, then apparently went into witness protection by the 2nd quarter; Kurt Cousins also scored a rushing touchdown on a botched snap. Jay Gruden punted from the Eagles 35. This team will win the division which will be funny because we all know they'll go 5-11 in 2016.
This Week: Visit the Falcons, who have a chance to sweep the NFC East.
Tweets of the Week:
"the faith in cousins has paid off for jay gruden." dude, they just beat the eagles.
— El Flaco (@bomani_jones) October 4, 2015
He gave the monologue from 'A Time To Kill' http://t.co/QnkrNHWgyy
— David Brookings (@davidbrookings) October 5, 2015
Philadelphia Eagles (1-3)
This Week: Found another way to lose a close game, falling to the Redskins 23-20. If not for the worst kicker in the league missing a field goal and an extra point, they could have won, but when you sign the worst kicker in the league that's what you deserve. In a perfect display of the season to date, Sam Bradford finally decided to throw deep and threw for 3 touchdowns and it wasn't enough. DeMarco Murray upped his rushing total for the season to 47 yards, which is pretty good for a half, he then complained that he wasn't getting enough playing time behind a line that can't block anyone. After gaining 9, 6 and then 8 (which was called back) yards rushing on back to back to back plays, Ryan Mathews never touched the ball again. They had one drive that lasted longer than 3 minutes the Redskins had six, no wonder the defense was exhausted at the end of the game. This team is not winning the division. They'll rally to finish 6-10 and miss out on drafting Connor Cook or Jared Goff.
Next Week: The Saints are marching in, winner gets to feel good about themselves for a few days before reality comes crashing back that they're old, expensive, and awful.
Tweets of the Week:
#eagles https://t.co/fa0k5zSmDN
— Kurt (@Kurt_BSH) October 4, 2015
Even Bradford's jersey doesn't fit right. He looks like a punter lined up at quarterback.
— Brian Billick (@CoachBillick) October 4, 2015