FanPost

FOLES SUCKS


Shaggyfoles2_medium

via wildaboutazcats.net




Hi dere and welcome to another week of "Pot will make your fantasy football team better". I had to change the title because for some reason the original one confused a lot of people. This week's theme is about never doubting your eagles players. Last week I had my doubts, and it bit me in the ass like an old grandma with new dentures. I was afraid to start DeSean Jackson because he was up against Revis, with QB who's deep ball I doubted. Instead I started Randall Cobb (who left early in the game and is now on IR), and T.Y. Hilton (who sucked). Luckily Justin Blackmon saved my ass from being completely shredded by that grandma. Additionally, I doubted Foles against a very good secondary in Tampa Bay, more than I doubted Terrelle Pryor. I even went as far as to convince myself that Pryor would be the better long term option. Now I know that Chip Kelly's offense will produce no matter what the matchup is. All those records set so far this season are no fluke. With Vick as my starting QB, I felt that I had to doubt Foles's actual ability, not just with respect to fantasy. I had a feeling that in a league of non-eagles fans, I wouldn't have to put in a waiver to grab Foles this week, but I decided that it was not worth risking and so I gave up my #2 spot for him. Now I have a feeling of comfort that all the beautiful green plants in the world couldn't even provide me with. Friends, I am in love. I am confident that Foles is not an inferior fantasy quarterback to Vick, so you all must get him. Cobb goes down, Blackmon emerges. Vick goes down, Foles emerges. Steven Jackson goes down,... god dammit Steven Jackson get healthy!

Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks Foles Sucks !

The point of this post is so that I can answer any questions you might have in the comments section, so I'll just do a brief Love/Hate based on players whom I think will perform better or worse than ESPN has them ranked.

QB Love:

Tom Brady: Ranked 11th by ESPN analysts probably because of his performance the past two weeks and the not so great matchup. History tells me that Brady poops all over the Jets every time he plays them. I don't care who is receivers are, I'm gonna go with history on this one.

Nick Foles: Ranked 13th... see above. Foles Sucks

QB Hate:

Cam Newton: Had a great week last week against a garbage defense so he gets ranked #2 out of all QBs for this week against a middle of the pack defense... what?

Aaron Rodgers: Didn't look great after all his receivers went out. Haden will shut down what he has left in Nelson. I don't expect "no hands" Finely and Jarrett Boykin to give him top 4 production like ESPN predicts.

RB Love:

Jaquizz Rodgers: Ranked at a dismal 32nd, Rodgers has been consistently productive since Taking over for SJax with Snelling. Tampa is tough against the run, but he gets work in the passing game, and they will rely more heavily on their backs with a depleted WR group.

Giovani Bernard: Ranked 15th. He's playing a Jim Washburn coached defensive line (wide 9), so naturally they can get run over (and have). Every Detroit game is usually a shoot out, and Gio get work in the run and pass game. I expect him to produce no less than he has been, which is in the top 10.

RB Hate:

Chris Johnson: He's only ranked 21st, but I have a hard time believing even that. He's streaky as all hell, and I think SF can shut him down.

Joseph Randle: Sorry for all of you that picked him up, but even against our Eagles defense, I don't see Randle producing top 21 numbers (tied with Johnson). He averaged something like 1.8 yards per carry against the native-indigenous-skins (apparently I can't say Redskins anymore or I receiver comments telling me to fuck myself (anthroeagle), and a warning from the editors (anthroeagle)), who have a worse run defense than us. He just isn't very talented. He might get a lucky goal line TD, but I don't think he'll be running all over us.

WR Love:

Justin Blackmon: They ranked him 15th. I don't know what they're smoking, but it's not weed.

T.Y. Hilton: Shot in the dark here because I thought he'd produce last week against the Chargers but if he blows up against someone there's a good chance it's the Broncos. ESPN has him ranked 23rd.

WR Hate:

Jordy Nelson: Ranked 10th... see Aaron Rodgers.

Steve Smith: Why is Steve Smith ranked 20th? He hasn't had more than 60 yards in a game this season, and he's coming of his second best week against a terrible secondary in which he only had 21 yards... also see Cam Newton.

TE Love:

Jordan Cameron: He should be looked for a lot against the Packers, who are one of the worst teams against TEs this year. I expect him to return to form, which is top 2, not top 5.

Jermichael Finley: Someone has to get the ball in Green Bay. He's expected to play some snaps at WR as well, so at least he'll be on the field a ton. I would guess he's in line for a better than top 7 performance.

TE Hate:

Garrett Graham: QB sucks. Not getting targets. Chiefs have been killing TEs. What more do you want? He is not a good replacement for Owen Daniels.

Joseph Fauria: Just in case anyone thinks his 3 TDs last week mean anything. He was only target 3 times, and only comes in during goal line situations. With a healthier Calvin Johnson, he'll go back to being almost not used at all. He's boom or bust right now in that he'll either score a TD from a few yards out or not score at all. And he will not likely get you any yards.

Defense Love:

Miami: At home, coming off a bye, and facing I have no idea at QB. This is a good defense, that has been facing tough opponents. Expect them to bounce back this week and be better than the 16th overall defense!

Defense Hate:

Minnesota: Monday night games tend to be higher scoring, and they are playing on the road. While Eli has been throwing more picks than most QBs have been throwing TDs, I still expect the G-men to put up their fair share of points against this weak opponent. If the Giants win a game this season, it might just be this one.

Riddle of the week:

What word can you NOT say before "skins"?

Answer: "RED!!!!" LIKE ELMO!!!!!

Elmo_medium

via www.sesamstrasse-live.de

Fantasy Football is stupid!!!!!

I got a warning for saying "WATCH FOOTBALL!!!!"

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