He's never coached against NFL caliber coaches and players

He doesn't have much defensive experience

He hasn't had to deal with NFL player egos

He changed his mind, that means he's wishy-washy and not committed

He coached against a weak Pac-10

He never won an NCAA championship

His name is Chip, that's not football tough

He's a little chubby,

He can't win a fist fight with anyone on the team but Alex Henery

Whatever his religion is, it's the wrong one

He has coached and lost football games before

I read that he called the wrong play a few times in the same game

He wore a visor with a zero on it for years. That out to tell us something.

He lived on the Left Coast for years. He's 3 hours behind everyone else. Kick off at 1pm EST, this guy's still on the pre-game toilet.

He last name is Kelly, rhymes with Jelly...that's not a good association for a tough team.

Andy Reid's aura has a 5 year half-life. No man can overcome that. When Chip loses his first twelve challenges?...that's the aura half-life, trust me on this.

He's 49. The guy's like practically dead already.

Little known fact: his real name is Charles. Just what is he hiding from?!

I heard he doped for 7 years

He grew up in New Hampshire, a state that congress is thinking of dropping to make room for Puerto Rico on the flag.....no really, i think that might be true

One of his nicknames is "Big Balls Chip". Fill in your joke here:_____________

He has a grand total of 0, count 'em, NO wins against Shanahan, Coughlin or Garrett. He has NEVER beaten them and has not a single damn excuse as to why not

So, sorry to be the bearer of bad news but I'm not about to get my hopes up here...not me...not me !

............OK, maybe just a little