SB Nation Philly Editor's Pick
The Signing of Nnamdi: A Skip Bayless Illustrative Story
by flyeaglesfly1020 on Aug 5, 2011 11:56 AM EDT
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PrintHere is the the story of Nnamdi signing with the Eagles, this time focusing on Skip Bayless, the "1st and 10" co-host with immense no sports knowledge.
Skip Bayless is sitting on the set of "1st and 10," about to go on air. He checks his phone, and calls over his assistant, Bill.
Skip: The Jets are out of the running for Nnamdi! He's coming to Dallas, baby!
Bill: I thought...I thought you said he was overrated and you didn't want him?
Skip: What? No I didn't. I've always loved Nnamdi! I was going to name my first-born son after him! Now that we got him, it's smooth sailing to the Super Bowl for us, Cowboys. No-one will be able to stop us. Give me a hug, Bill.
Skip: We got Nnamdi! We got Nnamdi! We got Nnamdi!
We got the best cornerback in the league! Super Bowl! Super Bowl! I need to write a letter to Jerry Jones:
Dear Jerry,
It's me, Skip, again. I haven't heard from you forever. Literally, ever. You must not be getting my gift's because you have yet to contact me about them. It's OK, I'm sure you're really busy. I hope you enjoyed the chocolate strawberries I sent you last week. Well, anyways, I just wanted to thank you for signing Nnamdi Asomugha, and congratulate the Cowboys on being the 2012 Superbowl Champions.
P.S. I am including a picture of me for you to hang up in your office. Love,
Skip
Bill: Uh, Mr. Bayless, ESPN is saying Asomugha signed with the Eagles, not the Cowboys.
Skip: Huh?
Bill: NFL.com is saying it too.
Skip: Asomugha...NOT coming... to the Cowboys?
Bill: Mr. Bayless, are you crying?
Skip: What?... No I'm not crying! I didn't really even want Nnamdi that much anyway. I knew all along some team would come in and overpay. I'm sure the Eagles overpaid for him. Jerry Jones is too smart for that. There's no way he's spending over $15 million per year on a cornerback.
TV in background: It's official. The Philadelphia Eagles have agreed to a 5-year, $60 million contract with Nnamdi Asomugha, paying him significantly less money than most people thought Nnamdi would require.
Skip: Only $12 Million??...I mean..$12 MILLION?!! They overpaid THAT much to get him? He's not even that good. He only has three interceptions in the past four years! Just 3 picks!!! I can't believe people think he's the best cornerback in the league. Overrated, for sure.
Bill: That's probably because he's only been targete-
Skip: OVERRATED!
Bill: QB's never throw his w-
Skip: OVERRATED!
Bill: OK, whatever you say.
Skip: I'm not crying.
Bill: I didn't say you were cr-
Skip: Bill, I'm NOT CRYING!
Later that night at Skip's house. . .
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Funny post mang.
Jason Peters: Heart of a Lion, Face of a Chipmunk.
Eli Manning has the personality of a baked potato.
The best part is the letter with the topless picture for ol’ rubberhead.
Jason Peters: Heart of a Lion, Face of a Chipmunk.
Eli Manning has the personality of a baked potato.
he is
shit brianless
okay i have cerebral palsy arthris and chronic fatigue as well i have a great life and loveing folks some days are better than other days i got a make-a-wish in 2001 and saw my favorite team the broncos it was the trip of a lifetime i wish everyone couild have gotten to enjoy that with me i know some of u hate the broncos and that okay but i bleed organ and bule for my mnr fans but i bleed orange and blue denver will rise again resident broncos fan for every blog resident broncos for stampede bule thanks shvd98z24 real name jeremy woodard nettleton high class of 02 yes i am a raider
I love this bc I hate skip bayless so much…he’s such a raging hypocrite and all of his arguments are based on his own opinion….definitely lol’d a lot…great post man
"I was the first option on the play and the quarterback made a great throw. I landed on my shoulder and neck and blacked out for a little while, but I'm fine now." - Djacc
So in other words...
he’s the 45 year-old, TV host version of TheRealLT.
by TommykUD on Aug 6, 2011 4:04 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Love it.
Defensive player of the year for 2011 is...
Wild_Eagle!
Yes, Wild_Eagle's infamous reputation did help him get this award. But he shows that he walks the talk that he serves...with his keyboard. Wild_Eagle protects the motherland (BGN) from the evils of noobs, douche-bags, and other assholes. Although he may be crude and unnecessary, all great defenders draws the yellow flag from time to time.
-Awarded by Number5
Wild_Eagles’ Heart is scarier than Hell, you lose. - d-jackfan10 at the troll known as vicksuck!
LOL
Winning is in our DNA
(Dominique-Nnamdi-Asante)
Asante means "thank you" in Swahili. Eli Manning means "here you go" in another language
Excellent
Ever since Mike and Mike this morning where skip talked farted words out his butt about Nnamdi being “overrated” and “Not darrelle revis” I have been waiting for the next anti-skip post. Thank you for not disappointing.
anyone see...
his top 5 teams in free agency? he listed the patriots over us for #1. He tried to say that ochocinco and haynesworth were better than all of the players that we had picked up. He is an idiot. Espn would be better without him.
brilliant
Oh boy, is this great!
by MayIhave10,000marblesplease? on Aug 5, 2011 3:32 PM EDT reply actions
Wow this brilliant, I hate skip bayless, and this is hilarious
My mojo so dope. BITCH!
Revis's Island< Nnamdi's Nation< Jimmy Smith's EGO
Great post
I just wrote a piece about skips’s little FA assesment, didn’t see this post first.
"The positions I played, every play, I was making contact, not like that … Deion Sanders. He couldn’t tackle my wife. He’s back there dancing out there instead of hitting." -Chuck Bednarik
by MidwesternEaglesfan on Aug 5, 2011 4:21 PM EDT reply actions
Did anybody see SportsNation a while back?
Colin Cowherd said the Cowboys were gonna go to the NFC Championship because when Garrett took over as head coach, they beat big teams like the Colts and the Eagles… The Eagles rested all their starters!
by ILL Eagle on Aug 5, 2011 4:45 PM EDT reply actions 2 recs
fuck skip
Reporter: "What have you done for T.O., besides getting him suspended?"
Drew Rosenhaus: "Next question."
by So. Cal Swag on Aug 5, 2011 9:44 PM EDT via mobile reply actions
*not literally
Reporter: "What have you done for T.O., besides getting him suspended?"
Drew Rosenhaus: "Next question."
by So. Cal Swag on Aug 5, 2011 9:45 PM EDT via mobile up reply actions
Well, if there was a PPV event involving Skip
being raped in prison, I’d probably pay the $50 and bring some popcorn.
It’s me, Skip, again. I haven’t heard from you forever. Literally, ever. You must not be getting my gift’s because you have yet to contact me about them.
This killed me.
Formerly DeSean10
36-5-20-JJ -- Forever Bleeding Green
If I had the time
creative ability, and intelligence needed, I’d have made the same post. Rec’d.
You have been banned from Big Blue View... "trolling the post game stuff at BBV is just classless and a great mark of a tool. Grow up man, enjoy your victory, but try to not reinforce every stereotype of a Philadelphia fan. Bye bye."
Hey guys, thanks for the compliments
Glad you enjoyed the post
by flyeaglesfly1020 on Aug 7, 2011 9:21 PM EDT reply actions
As much as I love seeing Skip Bayless mercilessly mocked, and mind you, I DO...
He’s such a tool that it defies description. He’s not worth mentioning. He had his name legally changed to “Skip.” There’s your first clue that he’s a twatwaffle. He was the lead sports columnist for the Dallas Morning News for 17 years, so there’s your second. In addition to his periodic Philly-bashing, his most recent example of supreme douchery came when he emphatically proclaimed that he “loved” Rob Ryan’s decision to label the Eagles the “all-hype team” despite the fact that it was the most pathetically obvious case of sour grapes since Aesop thought the idea up. Ryan and Jerruh practically had the red carpet dusted off for Nnamdi, and mere hours after he signed with us, Ryan did what the Ryan men do best, which is flap their voluminous jowls repeatedly, violently expelling bullshit at the mouth. Skip seems to forget that in this past decade, Dallas has been nothing BUT hype.
Oh yeah, speaking of idiot sports analysts, now that we’ve signed Vince Young and he’s struggling in camp, Merril Hoge will be the next to mouth off. Just you wait. I know I will, because I relish any opportunity I get to make fun of him.
And yes this is Philly, you welcome to come check us
Skip Bayless
Is a complete act like many media personalities. He says/acts the way he does to get paid. Period. You can’t really tell what he truly believe or doesn’t believe because he is always on with his schtick.
Frankly, if his schtick was entertaining it must be interesting. Just never found him funny, witty, or insightful.
This was pretty funny though.
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