Funny Skit

If anyone of of you hate the bears as much as I do then you'll appreciate any form of Bear Bashing given the chance. I must share this awesome skit SN:Charlie Kelly came up with over at Acme Packing. Check it out after the jump.

Bears: Hey Jay, we know you've had a long offseason and all, but we still believe in you and are dedicated to giving you as much help as possible

Cutler: (Texting on phone, paying very little attention)

Angelo: Jay, did you hear me? I said we’re getting you some help. We picked up an offensive tackle in the draft and now we signed Marion Barber.

Cutler: Annoyed) Who?

Angelo: Marion Barber, he’s a running back from the Cowboys. We feel that his power style will compliment Matt Forte and his ability to block will help on third downs.

Cutler: What? Yea, whatever…can’t you see I’m busy?
/Checks blood sugar
//Eats a cookie

Angelo: (Sigh) I was hoping we wouldn’t have to do this. Jay, we’re gonna have to let you go. Your attitude and lack of effort have become too much for us to handle. We need players motivated to win. Have your locker cleaned out by tomorrow, you’re heading to Oakland.

Cutler: Oakland? I can’t go there, their fans scare me. Besides, who are you gonna replace me with? I’m the first legitimate QB your pitiful team has had since that one asshole in the 80’s or something.

Angelo: Well, we’ve decided to go with…

(Door opens)

Grossman: Sup, you insulin needing bitch! The sex cannon has arrived! Now get the hell out of my locker room you chinless mother fucker!

Cutler: ……

Angelo: You see Jay, we need someone who has the confidence and swagger to win.

Grossman: You’re god damn right Angelo, you worthless piece of shit. I’ll win alright, I’ll win all over your wife’s face. And even if I don’t, you bet your god damned ass, I’m gonna chuck that fucking ball as deep as I can and score some fucking trim afterwards.

Angelo: Right….so anyways Jay, I’m sure you understand that we needed to make this move and I wanna wish you the best of luck.

Cutler: (Swoops bangs out of eyes by throwing his head back) Whatever, I don’t need this team or you.

/Leaves in a huff
//Writes bad poetry on his blog

Grossman: What the fuck is Wilford Brimley’s problem?

Angelo: Eh, I’m not really sure. Anyways, it’s great to have you back Rex. Practice begins tomorrow at 10 am, I look forward to seeing you.

Grossman: Yea, fuck that. I’m going out to the bars so I can unleash the dragon. Just call me when the games start.

by Charlie Kelly on Jul 30, 2011 7:18 PM PDT up reply actions   16 recs

Log In Sign Up

Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Bleeding Green Nation

You must be a member of Bleeding Green Nation to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Bleeding Green Nation. You should read them.

Join Bleeding Green Nation

You must be a member of Bleeding Green Nation to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Bleeding Green Nation. You should read them.




Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.