Andy Reid's Work Schedule

by goodfella46er on Nov 17, 2011 6:55 PM EST

One of my buddies forwarded me this hilarious timeline which he got from Maurice on Barstool Sports . After reading up on Andy's daily regimen, I now completely understand why he never runs the ball. And also why he is "calorically" challenged. (Yeah I made up that word, so what?)

The incredibly realistic timeline and a bonus Fat Andy photoshop after the jump.

via img809.imageshack.us

5:00 am – Wake up

5:30 am – Breakfast
6:00 am – Film Study
6:15 am – Film Study Snack
7:00 am – Snack Break
8:00 am – Find 3 Excuses to Tell Jeff
9:00 am – Mid-Excuse Pre-Lunch
10:00 am – Inspirational Team Speech
10:30 am – Post-Speech Hoagie
11:00 am – Pre-lunch Hot Pocket
11:15 am – Heart to Heart with DeSean
11:30 am – Urbandictionary.com to Figure Out What DeSean Said
12:00 pm – Lunch
1:00 pm – Catered Post-lunch Coaches Meeting
1:45 pm – One on Juan Defensive Meeting with Castillo
2:00 pm – Churro Break
2:15 pm – Grumble Four-Word Answers to Media
3:00 pm – 3 O’clock Pillow Scream
3:30 pm – Post Scream Ice Cream
4:00 pm – Fuck with Spadaro
5:00 pm – Shop Online for 5XL for Hawaiian Shirts
5:30 pm – Pre-Dinner Steak
6:00 pm – Dinner
7:00 pm – Cry on Toilet While Texting Donovan
7:45 pm – Satisfy Random Craving For S’more-flavored Pop Tarts
8:30 pm – Film Study
9:00 pm – Man Vs. Food is on!
10:00 pm – Design 3 new Goal line Trick Plays
11:00 pm – Emotional Breakdown While Staring at GB Super Bowl Ring
11:15 pm – Post-Emotional Breakdown Pot Pie
11:45 pm – Nap
12:00 am – Fourth meal
1:00 am – Ignore Incoherent Vince Young Voicemails
1:30 am – Eat all the Run Plays
2:00 am – Sigh Heavily to Self
3:00 am – Sleep

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Comments

This is from Maurice on Philly Barstool Sports. The Inquirer wishes it could write genius satire like this.

by The Reddgie on Nov 17, 2011 7:00 PM EST reply actions

Thanks

I updated it.

Why come you don't have a tattoo?

by goodfella46er on Nov 17, 2011 7:31 PM EST up reply actions

Fuck with Spadaro. hehe I wonder how PE feels about this.

AR should have to wear a Flava Flav necklace until he learns how to manage a fucking clock.
I am the proud target of temper tantrums.

by KByars on Nov 17, 2011 7:36 PM EST reply actions

lol - i was thinking the same thing.

I also got a kick out of “Cry on Toilet While Texting Donovan” and going on urbandictionary after talking to DJAX.

Why come you don't have a tattoo?

by goodfella46er on Nov 17, 2011 7:42 PM EST up reply actions

I liked that one too.

AR should have to wear a Flava Flav necklace until he learns how to manage a fucking clock.
I am the proud target of temper tantrums.

by KByars on Nov 17, 2011 7:44 PM EST up reply actions

It’s also another reason why I think he should be fired.

Follow @PhillyFollower
Writer at Iggles Nest
#FireAndyReid*

by PhiladelphiaEagles on Nov 17, 2011 8:43 PM EST up reply actions

hahah
it must suck to be famous sometimes

by ATLeagle on Nov 18, 2011 12:18 PM EST up reply actions

Eat all the run plays

That one may be a proven fact…

Even cats bleed Eagle green. . .

by The11thLetter on Nov 17, 2011 8:02 PM EST reply actions

Fortunately theory differs from practice

In theory, that means they should stink once they come out.
In practice… see Shady’s stat sheet.

French fries are really Belgian, sausages and bagels have the same amount of protein, two countries' names mean "turkey", and Santa Claus was invented by the Coca-Cola company. Is life weird or what?

Debe ser verde y volante - Πράσινο και να πετάει - It's gotta be green and it's gotta fly!

by Rabbit T on Nov 17, 2011 8:05 PM EST up reply actions

I know the numbers he's putting up

You obviously missed the point of that post…

Even cats bleed Eagle green. . .

by The11thLetter on Nov 17, 2011 8:50 PM EST up reply actions

Hehe, I guess this is based on Castillo's assertion that Reid works "22 hours per day"

http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2011/11/17/castillo-says-reid-is-working-up-to-22-hours-per-day/

Andy, I think I can save you 21 hours of “work”: Run the fucking football.

Seriously though, if he’s spending 22 hours a day planning for games and these piece of shit playcalling efforts are the result, then it really is hopeless. Just pathetic.

by Kevin888 on Nov 17, 2011 8:30 PM EST reply actions

LOL!!!!!

11:30 am – Urbandictionary.com to Figure Out What DeSean Said

"There is no struggle too vast, no odds too overwhelming, for even should we fail, should we fall, we will know that we have lived.--"Anomander Rake, Son of Darkness
Evil is relative…You can’t hang a sign on it. You can’t touch it or taste it or cut it with a sword. Evil depends on where you are standing, pointing your indicting finger. -Glen Cook The Black Company

by Udalango on Nov 17, 2011 9:50 PM EST reply actions